People think that the hardest holiday is Yom Kippur, a day of fasting and praying, or perhaps Passover, where for a week a large percentage of our normal diet is exchanged for chalky imitations, but it could be that Purim, is the most difficult of all. And this is alluded to as the Kabbalists observe that Yom Kippur, is that day that is ‘ki-Pur’, like Purim. In other words, the day we associate with utmost holiness is trying to imitate Purim.[1] So what is holy about Purim? (Please keep in mind that real internal holiness comes only with tremendous internal exertion[2], therefore, if there is an aspect of Purim that is as holy as it gets, then the internal work must be as hard as it gets.) Perhaps, it is the Talmud’s directive that we ‘increase our joy in Adar’[3]and let it reach its peak on Purim. This is a daunting task. I can control whether I eat or not or what I eat, but an emotion, and a positive one at that, seems to be only partly in my purview. But that is our work, to get happy, so how can we get there?
The easiest way is to spend some time around a baby, preferably between four to 11 months, which is what the book series ‘What to Expect in the First Year’ dubs the golden age of a person’s baby. And if we can figure out why a baby brings a smile to everyone’s face, and has the power to transform a room of adults into a room full of comic performers, singers, and ticklers, each vying to win over the baby’s fickle attention span, then we will be on the right track.
What does a baby do to garner such undivided attention- gape and grab. My baby’s wide eyes constantly scan the world like two searchlights and when the opportunity presents, she brings what she can close to her. Simply, the world is wonderful, because it is full of wonder. The number one joy-killer is habituation. For a baby, nothing is habitual and the newness of everything radiates on her face and inspires adults to enter her world. She reminds adults in the vicinity that there is yet what to discover in this world. Incidentally, for a person without a baby nearby, a blessing is the spiritual tool we use to create joy and destroy habituation.[4] Each time we take pleasure from the world, the blessing sends us back in time to recreate the pleasure as if it were new.
A baby not only appreciates the world in a way that radiates joy, but also reminds us about the joy of growth. Each new feat accomplished by the baby brings waves of satisfaction to the parent. I never thought that rolling over was such a great thing until my baby nearly accomplished the task. As she teetered on the edge, between the world of the back and the world of the belly, I looked on with rapt attention. Watching growth is a pleasure, so why not turn that attention to ourselves and revel in all of our growth over the years, and engage in activities that are growth oriented?
That is what we can do, but as in everything else, each holiday brings with it a spiritual flow. Around Purim, the spiritual alignments are in our favor for the month. So much so, that the Talmud continues and recommends that if a person is embroiled in a lawsuit, that they should try and chance upon the other party as things are more apt to go in ones favor this month. But the rest is up to us, and we need to catch the wave of joy in the air and make our lives permanently more joyful.
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